3 Steps to Overcoming Your Fears and Dealing with Change

JillMindset12 Comments

Let's face it: When you are gearing up to make some big changes in your life (like, starting your own business!) a lot of fears and anxieties start to creep in. You start to doubt yourself, your abilities and the reason why you are leaving your old, comfortable life behind for a whole new life of uncertainty.

Fortunately, our friend Sebastiaan van der Schrier from Social Anxiety Solutions had a bit of experience in this field. So we put him to work and got him to dish 3 actionable strategies you can use right now to shift your mindset and reframe your fears.

As always we know not everyone likes to watch a video. So we put together a free downloadable PDF transcript for all of you non-video watchers.

Just click that big ol' obvious button below to get it now!

Click to read the transcript

 Skip to the Good Stuff:

1:22 – a little bit about Sebastiaan and how he can help you
1:48 – the most common fears people feel
2:30 – how to get clear on what it is you want
2:42 – how to paint the picture of how you will feel once you overcome your fear of change
3:12 – the one question you want to ask yourself during this transition
3:39 – how to find out what is in the way of you achieving your goals
4:22 – a solid technique for reframing your fears
5:27 – the power of asking yourself “wouldn't it be nice if”


A Little Bit About this Episode:

One thing many of us wanting to make the change between employee to self-employed struggle with is what will happen if the business fails. In fact, so many people struggle with this fear that they talk themselves out of ever doing it before they even try it.

Trust me, we get it. We too have dealt with countless fears, anxieties, doubts and limiting beliefs surrounding our decision to run an online business, but there are ways to overcome your fears and re-frame them to empower you in your decisions.

Which is why we wanted to share this episode with you today because we truly believe everyone has it in them to start an online business…you just have to want it enough!

So if you want it, but you're just struggling with getting your mindset right, click play and listen to Sebastiaan's 3 easy tips to overcoming the fear of change.

Your turn: What is the biggest fear you currently have? And if you're feeling extra daring list both your “what if” question as well as your “wouldn't it be nice if” question.


  • Eddie

    Thanks for sharing this. I love the step about challenging your fears because when you get down to it, our fears are often irrational, and can be overcome. I also think action can help overcome fear – love the old quote ‘do the thing you fear, and fear will disappear’.

    Overcoming fear is definitely not easy, but it’s worth it. Plus, I’m still shit scared of a lot of things, but that doesn’t mean you have to let your fears stop you 🙂

    • Jill

      Eddie, every week you leave the best comments…and this one is no exception!

      I too am shit scared of SO many things but I usually find that to be an excellent indicator that I should go for it. Usually we’re most scared of the things we haven’t done so we assume they will be hard/horrible/we’ll fail at them.

      But more often than not, the exact opposite is the case.

      For example, I was super scared about releasing a product but low and behold we’re releasing a product. Am I scared? Hells yeah! But I assume that means it will be an awesome experience 🙂

      High-five to you, my friend, for the awesome input!

      • Eddie

        Thanks for the kind words Jill, appreciate it.

        I couldn’t agree more with your experience, the things I’ve feared the most too are usually the things I’ve needed to do, and that have helped me progress.

        That’s awesome about releasing a product, I can’t wait to see it. What kind of product is it? After seeing the kind of content you guys put out, and what you’re all about I have no doubt it’s going to be amazing 🙂

        • Jill

          Aw thank you so much Eddie! That means a lot to us 🙂

          We’re keeping the product hush-hush for the next little bit but my only hint is I’ve written on the subject before and it can be used as a SEO technique as well as a general outreach/brand building strategy! We’re super pumped about it!

  • Hi guys! I’m new to Screw but I wanted to speak up and say thanks for this episode! You know how sometimes the Universe just hands you exactly what you need? Sebastian’s three steps are perfect for what’s going on in my world right now.

    Fear is probably the biggest obstacle we all face and getting clear on what we want + identifying & challenging what’s in the way isn’t easy, as Eddie said above. But the pay off from grabbing your fear by the jewels and doing what scares the bejeezus out of you anyway is immense. And a little 3-step set of instructions for making that happen is priceless.

    • Jill

      First off, welcome to the Screw Stephanie! We’re thrilled you found us 🙂

      And I’m so happy to hear you found this episode useful…honestly, I was hoping it would reach someone going through your exact position because I know I needed something like this when I was hmm’ing and haw’ing about whether I should take the leap or not.

      If you ever have a question, shoot it through and we’ll screw it! lol

      Happy to have you around these parts 🙂

  • Ty Pedersen

    A great episode – I left a business partnership on August 31st 2012 – and while I had a plan – it has not gone the way I had intended. Also after having a staff of 11 and and sales force of 150+ to now just me I have been following people like yourself and retraining myself to adapt to the online & digital world and looking at how I can re-invent myself. I have recently embraced the Virtual Assistant ( i have 3 now :-)) and as of yesterday started promoting my new business to Hair & beauty salons with some promising leads. My fears have been around the lack of cashflow while getting systems in place so I think my goals and affirmations that i read daily have assisted in keeping me on track.
    I love the simple 3 step strategy – good work on such a relevant topic. – Ty

    • Jill

      Wow! What a change and reinvention! Congratulations on taking the leap, Ty 🙂

      I hear you on cashflow fears….I know them all too well from our earlier days and I know how stressful they can be.

      But one thing I do know is that an attitude of gratitude and some straight up hustling tends to always pay off.

      I have faith you can make things happen for yourself, just stick with it.

      And I’m pumped to hear the episode helped you out 🙂

  • Thanks for this post! I’ve been catching up on emails after having taken a few weeks off, and thinking seriously about what I can/should/could blog about that may impact others. I had landed on sharing my fears, then lo and behold just before I decided to quit skimming through my emails, I came upon yours. No doubt the universe is aligning with my wishes. I’ve been procrastinating on taking action for a while now, knowing it is fear based, so seems my decision to face it through transparency is a go. Thank you so much for that extra push! Reba

    • Jill

      Ahhh I love hearing this, Reba! Happy to have helped in even the slightest…and go get ’em girl 🙂

  • Hi! We enjoy your blog. Randy’s and my biggest fear is about taking the leap into early retirement sooner rather than later. Our ‘what if’s? are about running out of money too soon and going without formalized health insurance (we’d be medical tourists). We plan to live overseas, beginning in Chiang Mai and Malaysia and eventually working our way to Central and South America. Essentially, we would become full time travelers. Right now I am visualizing the feelings of pure joy and freedom we always get when traveling the world and about the opportunities that are waiting for us, even if we don’t know what they could be yet. To us, the worst case scenario would be having to go back to work at some point or becoming chronically ill without coverage. However, I am convinced that stress from staying in a career where we no longer feel fulfilled is more damaging to our health than taking this plunge into the unknown. So, thanks for your concise advice. It’s another sign (and we have seen a lot of signs lately) that we are on the right path for us. When you have time, check out our brand new bouncing baby blog.
    Good luck to you both!
    Lori and Randy
    Misawa, Japan

    • Jill

      Hey Lori,

      Thrilled to hear you guys are taking the plunge! Nice work 🙂

      As for health coverage…why don’t you just get traveller’s insurance?