A few weeks back I had a chat with my sister-in-law over a (big) glass of wine about being honest, and how it is truly the only way to behave in business.
Fast forward a couple days later and a blogpost sauntered into my inbox from one of my favourite bloggers on the web – Ash from The Middle Finger Project – about opening up and being unabashedly honest, and it ignited something in me.
It stirred a desire deep down inside, daring me to be utterly honest about my life.
I mean, for so long now I have wanted to just unleash and let it all out. Sure, we are honest with most things in our business, how difficult this lifestyle can be, how much we have failed and what it really takes to live this life; but not once have I bared my soul, opened myself up to hardcore criticism and let it all hang out.
Because I was straight up frightened of being judged, petrified of looking as though I don't have it all together and worried that by taking that step I would actually be taking a step back in our progress.
But fuck it. I'm going for it.
After all, so many of you have been honest with me about your fears, goals and dreams I figured it was about time I joined the party, lifted the veil on my highlight reel and let you into the behind-the-scenes on my life.
So without further adieu...
My 28 Truths
*takes a deep breath*
- I stressed whether to write this post for a full two days.
- We recently shot our first 4 episodes of Screw Qs and the perfectionist within me is absolutely petrified they will be total shit.
- About 6 weeks ago our affiliate sites got hammered by a Google update and within a month our income dropped by 40% - we are finally recovering but it was a rough month.
- I am scared I don't know enough.
- I don't have enough time or energy to spend catching up with friends on Skype and I have damaged some relationships because of that.
- I quietly speak to the Universe every single day.
- I get beyond frustrated with Josh for no reason.
- I have the world's most supportive, encouraging, honest, loyal and loving husband, and sometimes I forget that.
- I cry multiple times per month because our chosen path is fucking hard!
- I simply do not have enough hours in the day to finish everything I need to get done.
- I wish it was easier.
- I worry. A lot.
- I blame myself when my newsletters don't get the results I expected.
- I roll my eyes when someone Google's me (a phrase coined by my girl, Mish from Making it Anywhere) with a basic question they could easily look up on one of our sites or run an actual Google search for.
- My grammar is terrible yet I cannot imagine devoting the time to actually learning proper technique because I have a million other things to do.
- Josh and I almost stopped working together before realizing how lost we would be without each other.
- I am extremely wary of people who are overly-loud about how much money they make, how savvy they are, how successful they are or how well their business is doing.
- I hate listening to excuses.
- I am bossy.
- I had a mini heart scare a few months ago and had to walk around with a portable EKG machine...and then hid it from my parents until accidentally letting it slip.
- I don't know if Josh and I will ever have a "home" and that stresses me out.
- I over-think the hell out of things.
- I re-read my posts at least 3 times before publishing them.
- I was tormented by a bunch of girls all throughout high school and it still plays a role in how I react and deal with women in my adult life and the expectations I have of my inner sanctum of girlfriends.
- I dish out unsolicited business advice and then regret forcing my views on someone who may not be in that head space yet.
- I have a goal of making $25,172.85 per month. I don't know why I chose that number but it came to me, I stuck with it and I am adamant on reaching it!
- I am goddamn driven to help you live the kind of life you dream of.
- I am so fucking scared to hit publish on this post and toss it out into the world.
And that's me - unguarded, unfiltered and flawed.
I don't have the perfect life but what I do have is a purpose and a plan - a plan to teach you how to stop settling for an unexciting life.
A plan to teach you how to start a freedom-based business and replace your income in less than a year.
A plan to help you bask in a lifestyle that fills you with infinite joy, supreme gratitude and boundless opportunities; no matter what trials and triumphs come your way.
And these plans fill my life with undeniable purpose and are the reason I embrace this unconventional life.